Parenting Tip #2
Let Them Pay The Price While The Price Is Small
Parenting Tip #2, Let Them Pay The Price While The Price Is Small. Many times we want to shelter and protect our children from the pain of making mistakes. We find ourselves, for many different reasons, making excuses for them or overlooking their mistakes or poor behavior.
As parents, we must remember that which gets reinforced gets repeated. By removing the natural consequence for an action, choice, or behavior, the child has been reinforced that they can get away with what they did or did not do…. and at no cost or penalty. This most often results in repeating the action or behavior.
In addition, we are hard-wired to explore the boundaries. If the child doesn’t “feel” the boundary, they will push further. What starts as small becomes much larger and larger.
Challenge to parents. Shift your mindset. Instead of saying, “I don’t have the heart to give them a consequence.” Tell yourself, “I don”t have the heart Not to allow the consequence”. With that being said, it is also important to remember that oftentimes the natural consequence is enough. Also, be sure to sit down with your child and talk about what happened as a result of their behavior. Not in a critical way, but in a loving, nonjudgmental way. Assume that your child did not understand to think through how it would affect him and/or others. And last but not least, be sure that they “clean up their mess”. That they make things right. I often tell my clients and children, we all make mistakes. What separates boys from men and girls from women, is how well we clean up our mess and make things right.
When you learn from your mistake, you turn a mistake into a lesson.
~ Michele Reid
For more tips for parenting attend one of Michele’s workshops.
About the author
Michele Burch Reid, MS, founder of LCI, is an Organizational Effectiveness & Personal Development Consultant and Coach. Michele has a master’s degree in Industrial/Organizational Psychology, as well as several certifications. She helps clients create overall satisfaction & potential by tapping into their natural strengths with Personality Type, Emotional Intelligence Training, Biofeedback & other Brain-based tools. Michele’s philosophy is that when you discover what inspires you, you can more easily inspire and lead others. Whether that is in the board room, the classroom, or the family room.